Boring Relationships

Your partner feels distant…how do you get that connection back?  Well, the answer is chemistry!

Here’s a letter I received from a long time reader:

Dear Ryan,

I’ve lost all chemistry with my boyfriend!  It seems like we are not in sync like we were when our relationship first started.  I cannot get in touch with his feelings anymore.  Life is so robotic.  It’s cold, and I can’t take it anymore!  It’s like we’re in the same room, but he’s so far away.  This loneliness is getting to me.  What should I do Ryan?  I need help right away!

Sometimes we find ourselves in a relationship that isn’t working but there doesn’t seem to be any reason why. Perhaps you’re together a fair amount, you talk, and to anyone else you both look happy. What happens when one of you is happy, but the other isn’t?

It isn’t always obvious why some relationships fall apart on one side only. Your date is still enthralled with you, but you’ve lost interest.

Connection.  Chemistry.  

The chemistry in our relationships is the glue that binds us.  We need it.  It’s relationship oxygen.  We all are searching for a connection with others and you must have this with your boyfriend or girlfriend. If you’re going to be happy, you need to have a strong, deep, and fulfilling connection with them.

Everyone gets lonely at various points in their lives, but you shouldn’t feel lonely all of the time. When he or she is with you, you shouldn’t feel as though no one is present. If you feel this way, you need to determine why you do and make a decision about the future of your relationship.

Don’t question things too deeply!

Is it because you’ve had a rough day or something went wrong at work? Or is it because of a lack of connection with one another?

Lasting relationships have a strong, deep, and fulfilling connection at their core. If this is something that you are lacking, then you need to consider terminating your relationship with your partner. If you are thinking long-term, then you need someone who understands you and can be privy to your world. Don’t shut him or her out, but if they don’t understand then find someone else who does. Don’t spend all of your days in the same room, but so far away.

Long lasting relationships take a lot of work. Often, you’ll see the passion fade over time. But what if there was a way to get back those initial sensual feelings and keep them for good? Watch my FREE video presentation to see how…CLICK HERE to check out the video while you still can…

Are you looking to spice up your relationship? Many couples encounter stagnant phases where their relationship turns from romantic into boring. This article will cover what activities and actions can help you fall back in love and spice up your relationship!

Dear Ryan – My relationship is so boring I’m falling asleep.  Help!

Anyone who is looking to add a bit of “fun” and “spunk” to their relationship needs to realize one thing: You must be open if you want to spice up your relationship.  If you stick to the same boring things you used to do, you’ll get the same result every single time.  Relationships are supposed to have a spark of spontaneity to them.

You won’t find new ways to spend time together if you aren’t willing to be open to the possibilities around you. Start by creating a list with your partner of all of the different things that you would like to do together.  Just brainstorm.  Remember, there are no stupid ideas during brainstorms.  If you think that going to a Star Trek convention might be fun, just write it down.  It doesn’t have to turn into reality.

Then choose one to do. These activities can include things such as white water rafting, couples massage, joining a club or group together, attending an event or a concert together, etc. These could involve the bedroom as well. Trying a new sex position or incorporating toys into your bedroom could spice things up. It doesn’t matter what you want to do as long as it’s new.

Remember this formula: New = exciting.

I’ve seen dozens of couples fall out of love with one another simply because they were bored! This is one of the worst ways to end a relationship because both people still care deeply for one another but just aren’t sure what to do to rekindle their love. They aren’t sure how to make their relationship exciting.

When looking to spice up your relationship, just remember that it’s important to be open and to try things that both of you are interested in. At the same time, be willing to explore what your partner suggests, and vice versa. It’s important that you are taking risks and exploring opportunities together.  Half the fun is that you have someone to explore with.

These kind of actions will only strengthen your bond together and help to add excitement to your life. Usually it isn’t the relationship that is stale but it’s the actual individual lives that are. Spice up your life by doing something new with your partner and watch what it does for your love life!

Since you’ve seen some ways to spice up your relationship, my FREE video presentation will show you how to keep things spicy hot forever. Don’t know the 3 proven steps to a hotter relationship? Click here NOW to find out…

Relationship issues are difficult to deal with. They can ruin your life if left untreated. One of the cornerstones of happiness is the state of one’s relationships. Take care of yours. 

Relationship Issues
Cognitive behavioral therapy is one of the best ways to solve relationship issues.

I want to encourage you to solve your relationship issues by using cognitive behavior therapy, also known as CBT. CBT offers ways to understand your relationship issues and find solutions for them.

What CBT is about? It doesn’t sound like something that could actually help my relationship issues. I understand that you may feel hesitant to enter therapy to deal with your relationship issues, but it really is one of the best ways to clearly identify the problems and resolve them. You are always free to leave whenever you like, but I promise – it will do wonders for your personal life.

So what is CBT about? It’s about changing your thinking patterns into something more positive. You can fix your relationship issues by starting with your mind. It helps you to change the way that you respond to different things, building more awareness about the various associations that you have. It helps you find new ways of thinking about your problems that make you both happier and stronger.

Different people often respond in different ways to the same events. This is where CBT is helpful. It looks at the individual reasons for your responses. You are not factored into a formula, but instead addresses as an individual.

In your relationship, you may be responding to things negatively. You need to find ways to respond positively. CBT can help you determine why you are responding negatively and how you might respond positively. Other people who are going through similar things may respond to a situation with humor or consider it an avenue for personal growth. This is what CBT is all about. CBT is about finding the most healthy and most powerful ways to think about events in your life that previously you may have responded to negatively.CBT helps you to analyze your life and accept your surroundings, your behavior and your actions. It helps you to work with these three facets and discover hidden positives.

It is important to note, however, that CBT is not a method that you can administer on your own. It requires a trained professional to spend time with you, helping you to work through your thoughts and process your emotions. Because CBT looks at your thought patterns, it is difficult for you to do alone. You cannot adequately address your own thought patterns and see your thoughts objectively. Find a therapist who you feel comfortable with and are able to share your intimate thoughts. Together, you will be able to work through the issues surrounding your relationship and your life.

At the end of therapy, you’ll see yourself as more of an optimistic person who can positively frame events in his or her life.  You’ll also notice that your relationship issues are fading away. By working to better understand your patterns of thinking, you’ll grow as an individual and create better relationships in the future. Just because you’ve lived with various patterns of thinking doesn’t mean that you must continue living with them. Find a therapist today who specializes in cognitive behavioral treatment (CBT), put in the hard work, and watch as your life begins to reflect a happier you!

With your understanding of relationship issues, learn more with my FREE video presentation. Understanding the 4 stages of a breakup will help you avoid the most common issues couples face. Click here NOW to learn the key secret to a better, stronger relationship.

So many people write to me and talk to me about relationship doubts. It’s normal to have doubts now and again, but be sure that you’re not thinking about larger problems.

Dealing with relationship doubts can be a real pain.

When you first begin experiencing relationship doubts, then it’s time you begin to reflect on what is making you think that in the first place.  Do you wonder where the relationship is heading?  Do you wonder if it will ever turn into something serious?  Do you wonder if choosing someone else may have been better?

These relationship doubts could be a forewarning of major problems to come later on.  Take them seriously, but also don’t overreact.

If you don’t really like who you’re with, now is the time to be honest about it.  Having doubts is fine, and it might be telling you something: you’re not being really honest with yourself.  Maybe when you first started dating everything was fun, but now you feel that life has gotten stuck in a rut?

If you feel that you are having doubts about the relationship, but you still love your partner, then you should work to fix your problems. There are a variety of different ideas to saving a relationship.  You could try couple’s therapy if you’re serious, or maybe spice it up in the bedroom. Just make sure that you want to save your relationship first. If you’ve been a relationship for the past four weeks and you’re already having problems – do you think this person is really the right match for you?

It may simply be best to leave.  It sounds like hard advice to listen to.

So to determine what you should do, I recommend that you create a “Deal Breakers List.” Write down your top ten deal breakers. Then compare your relationship to your list.

Opposites do attract, but sometimes you can be incompatible with your partner.  If you’re a thrill seeker, always looking for the next adrenaline pumping adventure, then having someone grounded might be good, occasionally, but you won’t be getting your fix for new adventure.

Don’t worry, most relationship doubts are not all that serious and they dissipate within a few weeks.  It’s only when these doubts turn into real concerns, that we really consider breaking up.

After reading about how to deal with relationship doubts, I’d like you to check out more FREE content to improve your relationship. Learn how to rewind to a better life. One simple secret is all you need and it’s in my FREE video presentation . Click here NOW to get back to a blissful state. Don’t wait to erase your doubts TODAY.

I want to give you a three step solution to dealing with relationship problems.

These steps aren’t magic.  No one can promise instant bliss or a perfect relationship.  Anyone that does doesn’t know what they are talking about.  What I can offer you, though, is good advice about what I’ve seen works for couples who have had lots of problems and were able to work through them.

The first step is to realize there are no good guys and bad guys in this situation.  Obviously if there is violence or abuse in the relationship, then you need to leave, and there would be a bad guy there.  But in a normal relationship, you’ll find that with any argument you have, there’s always a different way of looking at things.  Maybe you’re at fault more than your partner, or vice versa.  Assigning blame is not really going to work in fixing your relationship.

The second step is to practice being a great negotiator.  Great negotiators always know how to communicate clearly and effectively by thinking not just from their own perspective, but also from the other side.  Negotiators are not going into a discussion thinking they are going to steamroll the other side, nor do they see everyone as opponents.

This is really important to success in any relationship.  It’s not just you!  Your partner has feelings and expectations as well.  How many of your arguments have started because you did something unilaterally and selfishly?  Did you try and negotiate, or did you run in and just say that you were going to just take what you wanted?

The third and final step is to get clarity.  It sounds a bit zen, but I’m talking about meditating or becoming enlightened.  It’s all about being rational about the state of your relationship.  If you feel that your partner is asking a lot of you or not pulling their weight, clarity will give you the ability to see all of your problems clearly.

So what do we do with these three steps?

You use them all the time. Whenever an argument starts or you feel like your relationship is in jeopardy, you remember these three keys, and focus on them.  Put yourself in the mindset of a negotiator, remember that in any conflict there are no good guys and bad guys, and focus on achieving clarity.  You’ll find much more relationship bliss if you apply these techniques.

After reading about how to work on your relationship problems, I’d like you to check out more FREE content to fix your issues . Learn how to rewind your relationship and make it better and stronger. One simple secret is all you need and it’s in my FREE video presentation . Click here NOW to get back to a blissful state. Don’t wait to have the best relationship of your life TODAY.

Is your relationship about to end?  Do you feel anxious about the future?  If you are worried about relationship endings and worried about your own, here’s some advice.  

You may wonder if your relationship is over.  Sometimes it feels like we could just hang on a little longer, but that’s not necessarily true.  When a relationship ends, it feels like everything is up in the air and the future is unclear.  It’s absolutely important that when we feel a relationship is ending to keep logical.

Here are four key points to consider if you think your relationship is ending. These are danger signs for your relationship.

The first is constant fighting and arguing. That is one common sign that a relationship is ending.  In fact, I’d say that this is a surefire sign.This is not healthy. I’m not talking about minor disagreements. Those are bound to happen and will continue to happen. However, if you’re always having disagreements and conflicts then there is a problem.

The second thing is a sense of distance between the two of you. If you feel some sort of disconnect from your partner then you need to take notice. Do you feel you cannot talk to them as intimately as you used to?  Communication is important in a relationship and if the two of you feel that you are on opposite ends of the world, you want to address these feelings. Or you may find that you have a physical gap and both want different things in terms of intimacy.

Next is cheating. Any kind of infidelity or even just looking elsewhere for a deep, emotional connection is a bad sign.  If your partner has cheated on you then you need to head straight for the exit.  Once a cheater, always a cheater.  Sometimes there are extenuating circumstances but the best way to not let it happen again is to close the door and kill the possibility forever.

The fourth is lack of enjoyment. This is a pretty easy aspect to notice about a relationship. You’re bored, they are sexually frustrated and you don’t look forward to spending time together. This can often be a factor if you think your relationship is ending.

If you notice these signs in your relationship it’s important that you act immediately. Don’t panic. “My relationship is ending!” It doesn’t have to. Relationships don’t heal themselves, but you can heal yours if you are willing to put in the effort. Think of your relationship as an investment and begin investing heavily now.

So here’s what I suggest you do. First, figure out what’s going on and create a game plan. Whether you want the relationship to end or you want to save it, you need to create a plan. Then follow it. The worst feeling is repeating the same problems over and over again. Talk openly and honestly with your partner and evaluate your feelings together.

If you are worried that your relationship is ending, make sure you take action immediately. It’s alway best to prevent the ending then try to get back together after you’ve already broken up.

With your understanding of if your relationship is ending, learn more with my FREE video presentation. It’ll show you how to keep your relationship on track and healthy. Understanding the 4 stages of a breakup gives you a roadmap to success. Click here NOW to learn the key secret that makes it all possible.

Here are three tips you can use to save a marriage.  They are tested and have been known to work.  Just do them!

The first tip is to do as many couples exercises as possible. Just tips to save a marriage won’t have as much impact as actual exercises.  You have to be proactive in saving your marriage.  You cannot sit back and wait for life to make decisions for you.

There’s a lot out there that can really help you for your relationship. These are better than tips to save a marriage because exercises are like fun little challenges you complete together.  My website is really a great start to get a new handle on your relationship and see all the possibilities for yourself.

With a couple’s exercise it is something you can together. It can be in the form of an assessment to more of a homework form, physical exercises and questions. You want something that you can actively do together. This is what causes growth in a relationship.

What do these exercises actually do?

These exercises function as a kind of communication tool and are a good way to add a bit of “fun” to this process. These exercises and tips to save a marriage could really push you outside your comfort zone – this is why they work.

Think of it as a board game. When I was younger, I loved playing Monopoly and Stratego. Consider these exercises as ways to create a fun game with your partner while working on your relationship. You’ll be amazed at your new growth.

Secondly, you want to have a really good strategy for dealing with conflict and stress because when you’ve got problems in your life, you need to have a system and strategy for dealing with them that is effective. You don’t want stress to ruin your relationship.

Use humor to try and combat negative emotions.  Laughter is the best cure for a negative mood and its useful to snap yourself out of an argumentative state. Perhaps you need to have a time out. Some couples have a word that they use when things are beginning to reach a nasty place. Then when the word is said, they leave and go into different rooms. Then later, after they have both calmed down, they come back together and talk things through rationally.

The third principle is to be extremely positive about your marriage. Any tips to save a marriage need to be based on the idea that you can have the best marriage imaginable.

You need to feel very optimistic about your relationship. Think of all of the wonderful things that you love about your partner.

For the time being, focus on your strengths. Look at the things both of you do well. Look at the really good parts of your marriage and look to increase the magnitude of this and to really strengthen your strengths.

From these, you’ll be able to get the energy and the resources to resolve and address the weaknesses as well.

After thinking about tips to save a marriage, watch my FREE video presentation to ensure your relationships NEVER go stale. The 4 secret stages of a breakup are the key to understanding how to save a marriage. Click here NOW to learn the key secret that makes it all possible.

You need to know how to stop divorce, and you need to know it now!  I can understand what it’s like being in full panic mode, and here are some tips you can use RIGHT NOW to stop divorce.

When a marriage is on the brink of divorce, we feel like we’re in a house of cards that’s collapsing all around us without any help in sight.  It’s all too easy to go straight into panic mode when you think your spouse is about to leave you a Dear John letter.  Don’t sit there and do nothing!  Your partner needs to know that you value the marriage to the point that you’d do anything to save it.  This is so important right now, that I want you to reread the last statement until it gets into  your soul.

Take a break from work, the kids, in laws, and everything else that you feel is an encumbrance on your marriage, and whisk yourself and your spouse away.  So often I see couples on the brink of divorce because of financial problems, family problems, illness, and other outside influences.  You cannot expect to repair and heal your relationship in a state of panic.  You might not have much money, but try to remove yourself from your old environment to see your relationship with fresh eyes.

Once you do, it’s time to take a deep breath.  You’ve done a lot to help yourself already.  Most people don’t make it this far.  What you need to do now is to be brutally honest with yourself and air out all of your grievances with your wife.  Whether it’s finances, or adultery, or any problem that you have in your relationship, you need to air your dirty laundry.  Silence is a relationship killer.  You’re essentially saying you don’t trust your partner with your thoughts or emotions.  That’s no way to stop divorce.

If you do have the money, I heartily recommend going on a marriage retreat.  Whisk yourself away to the mountains of Wyoming or touch dolphins in California.  You have to do whatever it takes at this point.  These retreats are great because you can sit down with a licensed therapist who can help you with your problems in a relaxed, stress free setting.  Do not wait to get this done, because the longer you procrastinate, the more likely you will not be able to stop your divorce.

Now that you’ve learned how to stop a divorce, check out my FREE video presentation that shows you how to rewind your relationship so you’re not in an uncomfortable situation that kills your happiness. Click here NOW to learn the secret behind every happy, successful relationship.

Can sexless relationship therapy really work?  Can it repair a loveless relationship?

Sexless relationships occur when one partner is dissatisfied with the amount of sex happening in the relationship. Usually in these cases, the sex drive of each partner is mismatched, where one partner wants to make love with far greater frequency than the other. There is natural variation in the human sex drive, so it’s highly possible that you can connect with your partner on a number of levels, but in terms of the bedroom, you two can be polar opposites.

In other cases, though, some couples simply lose interest in having sex. Many married couples go for years without having sex, but it’s only recently that this problem is being talked about in the open. Why are there sexless relationships, and does sexless relationship therapy really work? There are ways to deal with a passionless marriage, because a sexless relationship can lead to divorce or separation. Couples who undergo sexless relationship therapy usually lead happier lives. But what type of therapy is best?

When looking through the many books on sexless relationship therapy, or when trying to choose a therapist, always remember that the best sexless relationship therapy is usually intensive and lasts awhile. 

Beware of any book that promises to magically bring romance back into your life, especially with little effort or superficial exercises.

Most of the time, sexless relationships are due to a past trauma in one partner’s life that had remained secret, or other deep, complex issues that cannot be dealt with in a single therapy session or a simple exercise. The longer it is you’ve gone without sex as a couple, the more intense therapy you’ll need. Marriage boot camps are excellent forms of therapy for severe cases, as you’ll spend hours with a trained therapist in a closed, intimate setting, where you will be able to talk at length about issues that may have been bothering you, but you were never conscious of. These camps are usually retreats and most couples who go to them rave about their efficacy.

Specialized Sexless Relationship Therapy

Tantric yoga is a great way to bring a spark back to a relationship and is an effective form of sexless relationship therapy. Tantric yoga focusses on getting the person to be in tune with the energy of their body, especially sexual energy, and teaches people how to heighten their sensory perception. Couples who do tantric yoga together report that their intimacy increases many fold after a few sessions, and find that it’s easier to initiate love making once they reconnect with their spouse. Check your local yellow pages to see if there is a tantric instructor in your city. Even if you have to make a long trip, it’s quite worth it.

Sexless relationship therapy is designed to rebuild intimacy and help you and your partner reconnect and make you remember earlier parts of the relationship when there was still passion and fire. Any therapy worth its salt will not be easy, but the rewards will last a lifetime.

Now that you’ve learned about sexless relationship therapy, I’d like to show you a short video that will help you rekindle all those blissful flames of desire you once had with your lover. It’s possible to rewind your relationship and make it better than ever before. You just need to know one simple secret and my FREE video presentation will show you how. Click here NOW to revitalize the passion in your relationship. You owe it to yourself…and your lover.

If you find yourself in a sexless relationship, don’t panic. You are not alone.

A sexless relationship is really stressful and I have seen it ruin lives and leave people feeling empty inside.  Sex is such a vital part of a healthy relationship and building intimacy with your partner is so important that when your relationship becomes sexless, it feels as if your partner has betrayed an unspoken trust between the two of you.  If you find yourself in the midst of a sexless relationship, here is how you can survive it.

You are not going to last long without sex.  Some people have relationships with people who are really asexual, and they love their partner, but end up having to find sex elsewhere.  I have never liked these relationships.  I understand they feel a bond with their partner, but the fact they go elsewhere for sex is what makes it seem as if the relationship is more of a friendship than anything else.  You might think it’s okay to go looking for sex with someone to take care of your needs, but this is a mistake.

Do not commit adultery or cheat.  This is the worst mistake you can make.  Think about it: how can you rebuild your old relationship if you are cheating and your partner finds out?  If you really want to start a new relationship, why not cleanly cut off the old one before moving forward?  You must always be fair to yourself and fair to your partner.  If they find out about your cheating, then your relationship is over.

You’ll have to deal with the relationship problems head on if you are not already planning to separate.  You’ll have to rebuild intimacy, and you’ll have to figure out how you can reconnect with your partner.  If you are dedicated to the idea of rehabilitating your relationship, then you’ll do whatever it takes.  You’ll take time off work, you’ll set aside time during the week, and you might even invest in a clinical psychologist to look into your relationship problems.

No one can really go on with life surviving a sexless relationship.  Sex is a cornerstone of a relationship; without it, the boat sinks.  You cannot just ignore the problem either.  You’re only human, and you need intimacy and the comfort of your partner’s body.  You’ll be depressed and angry without it.  Don’t fight it.  Come up with a plan!  Read through this website to try and develop one, and you’ll come out alright.

Since you’ve read about surviving a sexless relationship, my FREE video presentation will show you how to get back the spark that once was. Don’t know the 3 proven steps to accomplish this? Click here NOW to rewind the relationship and she’ll be into you forever.