Breaking Up

At some point in your life, if you haven’t been there already, someone is going to break your heart: a friend, a family member, a date. This article deals with that of the latter. When your boyfriend or girlfriend breaks up with you…and you didn’t want to end things…what do you do? How do you make sense of what life has handed you and find solace once again?

You must return to you after a bad breakup. What does that mean? Return to you? When your feelings are overwhelming you, it’s time to find peace within yourself. You need to find strength within and look inside to find healing. It’s time to let go.

Think about what you like to do and try to participate in activities that help you find your true self. Make this about you. It’s okay. You’re on your own again. Single. Keep your friends and family close for support, but embark on your own solo journey.

Some Ideas: Mediation. Walks in Nature. Explore the Ocean. Explore the Woods. Explore the Mountains. Explore the farmlands. Yoga. Run. Biking. Art. Sports. Academia. Learn something new. Try something new. Go somewhere new.

Think of this as a way to go back to who you are. To find yourself again. No matter how long you’ve been a couple, you’ve been thinking in “we” instead of “I.” Give yourself a chance to go back to the “I” and work out who and where you want to be in your life.

When breakups occur, it can be hard to look beyond it. Particularly if you were madly in love or didn’t want the relationship to end. Sometimes the relationship was long-term, lasting for years, and now it’s hard to know what to do with yourself. I’d ask you to embrace this idea: freedom at the end of a breakup.

You’ve probably heard this before, but I want you to truly consider it.

Alexander Graham Bell is quotes as saying, “When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one that has opened for us.” This applies to dating as much as it applies to life. Don’t spend all of your time looking at what once was. Try to see this breakup as a new chance at life. It’s a brand new start.

This feeling can be thrilling if you let it be. Go out and do something new that you’ve always wanted to do, but held back from before. Let your time be now. Don’t hang back in the past. Don’t focus on the future. Try to live in the NOW. Let the present moment overwhelm you with all of its gifts. You’re now free, whether or not you want to be. Try to make the most of it.

It’s amazing how often personal priorities are overlooked. Don’t make that mistake…

When you’ve been through a bad breakup it can be difficult to know what to do or to find a new focus. She’s all you can think about and you want to win her back. Maybe you need to find another girl or focus on your friendships. No. After a breakup, the only person that you should be focusing on is – YOU.

Focus on you.

It sounds wrong, doesn’t it? That won’t help you win her back. That will only lead to self-pity or guilt. It’s okay. First, it may help you win her back. Second, in order to process your feelings and work through the breakup, you need to focus on yourself.

Think about the future. There will be another breakup, another girl, another love. You just have to remain open and be willing to go in search of it. This is a time for you to figure out what you want from a relationship and what you want from your own life. No one is asking you to compromise. Choose to do what you want and go after the kind of girls that have qualities that you want.

Let this be a liberating time. Find your own sense of freedom and explore who you are. Your future relationships will benefit greatly from your new sense of self and you’ll feel better as well.

Once you truly understand who you are, eventually you’ll want to get back in a relationship and be dating. After awhile the excitement fades. To get back to the blissful stages of a relationship…and prepare yourself to avoid problems and fights…watch my FREE video presentation. Check out the video while you still can…CLICK HERE.

You think your spouse or significant other has cheated on you.  How do you broach the subject?

So, he cheated on you.  You’ve got the evidence: a credit card bill for a local motel or pictures of his romantic interludes with his mistress.  You’ve caught your significant other breaching the trust you’ve built for so long, and now it feels terrible.  You have just been rejected as deeply and as broadly as any human can ever be rejected.

Not everyone has had someone cheat on them, but many people have. If it happens to you, you may find yourself fraught with questions. Should you ask who it was? Should you stay together? What should you say if he or she breaks up with you for this other person?

I am just not in a good emotional state right now.

It’s best to only ask questions if you’re sure you can handle the answers. In most cases, no answer is better than knowing the truth. Do you really want to know who he was sleeping with? Do you really want to know what she was doing with that other man at the bar?

Knowing answers usually leads to an intensity of feelings and emotions that you may have been able to avoid otherwise. You might want to ask if it’s someone you know. That makes sense. If your best friend is the one who’s cheating with your man, you’ll want to know so that you can deal with your friendship with her. However, if your ex says it’s someone that you don’t know, you may want to stop there. Think of what good it would do you to know that information. It wouldn’t do you any good.

It feels like my entire world has ended…

Let yourself grieve and ask the questions that you need for clarity and closure. Just be careful about asking for too many details. This often makes the breakup hurt more and the betrayal feel worse. If you want to stay with your partner and he or she wants to stay with you, then you may need details. If you’ll be going your separate ways, it’s better to leave those up to speculation.

Only get the answers that you need and leave the other ones alone. Ignorance really is bliss in this situation.

If you are thinking about getting a divorce, or feel that your marriage is falling apart, then you might be interested in these divorce facts.  The state of divorce in the United States gives us a picture of the type of state the country is in.  Some of these statistics may prove to by quite shocking.

Here are some shocking facts and stats about divorce:

  • Every ten to thirteen seconds someone gets divorced.
  • 50% of women and 33% of men remain angry for ten years after a divorce.
  • Women have more trouble starting new relationships than divorced men do.
  • More than 90% of divorces in long-standing marriages involve infidelities some time during the marriage.
  • More than 50% may be involved in a current affair, yet only 25% cite an affair as an actual reason for divorce.
  • 80% of those who divorce during an affair regret the decision.
  • Over 75% who marry partners in an affair eventually divorce.
  • The divorce rate and ratio of infidelity are much higher among marriage partners in an affair.
  • The average affair lasts two to four years.
  • If an affair becomes public it is doomed.
  • If an affair replaces the marriage, it is subject to the same emotional stresses as the marriage but is twice as likely to fracture.
  • An affair prevents binding ties from being formed. Eventually it has nowhere to go. Sooner or later it will suffocate in secrecy.
  • Affairs die for the same reason as marriage, lack of intimacy.
  • … Do any of these stats remind you of your marriage, your divorce or a partner who cheated on you?

If so, you should know, you are FAR from alone. There are millions of people in the United States who are in your EXACT same predicament.  Post a comment, below. Let me know about your relationship and your situation.  It’s better to get your emotions out and one the table than to bottle them up inside, forever. Have A Happy Relationship, – Ryan

Since you’ve read about these surprising divorce facts, my FREE video presentation will show you how to make sure you don’t become a statistic. Don’t know the 3 proven steps to fix your marriage? Click here NOW to reverse any damage and restore the bliss you used to feel.

To get over ex-girlfriend is learn to how to deal with change. Change is inevitable in this situation.

What’s going to help you most of all if you want to get over your ex-girlfriend is dealing with change.  Life is all about changing circumstances.  Sometimes things go our way, and sometimes they don’t.  If you can learn to deal with this simple, yet difficult aspect of life, you can know exactly how to get over an ex-girlfriend.

Dealing with change can be really hard when we were in a serious relationship and we thought that things would last forever.  Often they don’t though.  One day you can be with your mate of a lifetime, and then the next, you’re on your own.

Learning to accept that life has ups and downs is the key to success in getting over an ex-girlfriend.  

There are good ways to deal with change, and there are poor ways to deal with change.  Knowing the good ways to deal with change will make the breakup process go smoother and leave you a better person, which is our goal.

Change is a normal part of life.  Accept it and move on.

Here are three things that will help you to deal with change.

First, realize that good and bad events are going to happen in our life.  However, they are negative or positive based on how we choose to react.  Sometimes a negative event is actually positive, we just didn’t see it at the time.  When we are singlemindedly focused on getting over an ex-girlfriend, this simple fact is easy to overlook.

For instance, I knew a guy who was head over heals for this girl.  They dated for six months and were even thinking of buying a house together and living happily ever after.  Sounds perfect, doesn’t it?  Well, they broke up and he felt that his life was indeed over and that he’d never find anyone again.  3 years later, I caught up with his old girlfriend and found that she was the type to stay with men for a few months at a time, take their money, and cheat on them.

Their breaking up was actually a good thing!  Who wants to be around someone like that?

The second thing is to get some help.

Sometimes dealing with change can be very stressful and very traumatic.  One of the worst things you can do at this point in time is to suppress your emotions . Therapy can seriously help you to get over ex-girlfriend. Just talking about this with someone can really help.

This method is effective.  You need a support network.  No one person is an island onto themselves.

The third thing that you can do to help you deal with getting over an ex-girlfriend, is a change in your lifestyle.  Embrace what has happened.  Don’t fight it!

think of all of that new opportunities that lie in front of you, and all the new and exciting things you might be able to do with your new found freedom. To be positive in this situation is to fully get over ex-girlfriend.

Re framing is being a very positive experience and look at how you can make the most of this.

Since you reviewed how to get over an ex-girlfriend, get more FREE content to avoid a failed relationship. Rewind your relationship if something goes wrong. My FREE video presentation teaches how to keep relationships fresh, exciting, and passionate. Click here NOW to learn the simple secret.

Many people ask themselves at one time or another, “How do I know when it’s time to break up?” This is a difficult subject because breakups are often difficult, especially if you have been with someone for a long time.

how do I know when its time to break up
Puppy love isn't always forever.

The first thing you need to do when considering breaking up with someone, is think about your relationship together. Is it rewarding? Do you deeply care about the person? How do you care about them? Do you just want to be there for them as a friend or do you desire something more? Listen to what you’re feeling.

If you still feel deeply for your girlfriend or your boyfriend, then stay with them! If you feel as though it’s time to move on, then do so! It’s all up to you.

If you think it’s time to break up with your significant other but you aren’t really sure, then consider how the relationship has been over the last month or two months. Do you get excited when you go out together? Does calling or texting your significant other feel like a chore or is it fun?

When it becomes a chore to communicate with your partner and to spend time with them, then it’s time to break up. You should be enjoying your time together, not wishing it would end.

How do I know when it’s time to break up? When I no longer enjoy spending time with my significant other or I no longer have any desire to kiss him/her and just want to be friends.

 

So many people write to me and talk to me about relationship doubts. It’s normal to have doubts now and again, but be sure that you’re not thinking about larger problems.

Dealing with relationship doubts can be a real pain.

When you first begin experiencing relationship doubts, then it’s time you begin to reflect on what is making you think that in the first place.  Do you wonder where the relationship is heading?  Do you wonder if it will ever turn into something serious?  Do you wonder if choosing someone else may have been better?

These relationship doubts could be a forewarning of major problems to come later on.  Take them seriously, but also don’t overreact.

If you don’t really like who you’re with, now is the time to be honest about it.  Having doubts is fine, and it might be telling you something: you’re not being really honest with yourself.  Maybe when you first started dating everything was fun, but now you feel that life has gotten stuck in a rut?

If you feel that you are having doubts about the relationship, but you still love your partner, then you should work to fix your problems. There are a variety of different ideas to saving a relationship.  You could try couple’s therapy if you’re serious, or maybe spice it up in the bedroom. Just make sure that you want to save your relationship first. If you’ve been a relationship for the past four weeks and you’re already having problems – do you think this person is really the right match for you?

It may simply be best to leave.  It sounds like hard advice to listen to.

So to determine what you should do, I recommend that you create a “Deal Breakers List.” Write down your top ten deal breakers. Then compare your relationship to your list.

Opposites do attract, but sometimes you can be incompatible with your partner.  If you’re a thrill seeker, always looking for the next adrenaline pumping adventure, then having someone grounded might be good, occasionally, but you won’t be getting your fix for new adventure.

Don’t worry, most relationship doubts are not all that serious and they dissipate within a few weeks.  It’s only when these doubts turn into real concerns, that we really consider breaking up.

After reading about how to deal with relationship doubts, I’d like you to check out more FREE content to improve your relationship. Learn how to rewind to a better life. One simple secret is all you need and it’s in my FREE video presentation . Click here NOW to get back to a blissful state. Don’t wait to erase your doubts TODAY.

Finding a healthy way to deal with relationship break-ups is a life skill in and of itself…

Relationship break-ups can really ruin our life rhythm.  Our life goes from feeling in sync, like our circle is complete, to a darkness that pervades our senses and takes the sweet taste of life.  You begin to blame yourself and run through your mind about how things could have been different.  What if you had just been more open minded?  What if you had been more flexible, or listened more?  What could you have done to prevent the breakup?  These kinds of thoughts are unproductive and I’ll help you figure out how to move past them.

The first thing you should do is forgive yourself.  You may not be able to forgive your partner right now for all the hurt feelings that come with any break up.  Maybe you broke up because of infidelity or because your partner felt that  their life path would take them somewhere where you weren’t.  This happens.  You must first forgive yourself and stop torturing yourself over what’s happened in the past.  You must go through the grief of loss, and then give your relationship a funeral.

It’s Okay to Grieve

Grief is a natural part of loss, and an essential part of life.  We grieve so that we can remember the good parts, and then move on.  Perhaps you are not used to grieving?  Perhaps you want to hang onto your relationship.  If you hang on to it, it’s real for you in some way.  This part is natural.  Remember your relationship  for what it was.  Was there passion?  Was their excitement?  Was there romance?  Did you feel secure in knowing you had found your soul mate and that life was looking up?

It is so crucial that you do not feel self pity or try to suppress your emotions.  You don’t have to carry on as if life was perfect without your significant other.  It’s okay to go home and cry, to look over old photos, and to let yourself feel what you feel.  This is such an important step.

Give Your Relationship a Funeral

It’s time to forget the past.  It’s over with.  Your boyfriend or girlfriend are probably going through as much internal turmoil as you are, but it’s not time to dwell on that. You need to start concentrating on your future and thinking about how you want to improve your life from here on out . Remember to always cherish yourself.  Treat yourself to a candlelight dinner or take a walk through the park.  Write a poem about yourself.  It’s time to think of silly ways you can remind yourself about just how wonderful of a person you are, and to forget your ex forever.

 

Since you’ve read about relationship break-ups, my FREE video presentation will show you how to make HER want you back. Don’t know the 3 proven steps to fix your relationship? Click here NOW to reverse any damage and she’ll be yours forever.

When you’re dealing with a relationship break-up, it can feel like the world has ended and there is no future.  I’m here to tell you, that’s not true.

There’s so much generic advice out there about how to survive a relationship break-up, that I want to finally put an end to the debate.  I’ve helped couples date, fall in love, and even marry, but I’m also all too familiar with the darker side of dating, when people break up and feel they no longer want to be together.  As much as I would like dating to be all about fun and games, this is a serious issue that needs to be addressed.

The most important thing to remember is that this is not the end of the world.  I know, everything was magic.  You and your partner were going to conquer the world together.  You were building attraction and learning all about each other, and now the journey is over.  Well here are some things to remember:

A lot of couples get back together or enter into less formal yet equally romantic relationships.  You need to value yourself and tell yourself that this is the journey of life and that you are going to find the right match.  Just because you breakup now does not mean that you will never get back together again.  I have all sorts of articles on how to get your ex back, so if you really think breaking up was a mistake, read through them.

Second, you need to fill your day with something new.  You cannot sit at home in the dark and brood about the breakup.  The best way to survive a relationship breakup is to remember that the beat goes on, whether you like it or not.  Tomorrow will come, so why not enjoy it instead of making it torture?

Go jet skiing or hang gliding!  Try out a new game or go to the gym.  There are thousands of activities that can fill your day, and new experiences that do not require a girlfriend or boyfriend to do.  Part of surviving a breakup is saying to yourself, “I’m better than what the other person thought.  They are missing out on me.”

If reinventing yourself doesn’t work, and if taking your mind off the pain doesn’t work, then I suggest you be honest with yourself and try  to repair things with your boyfriend or girlfriend.  It’s possible and it’s a lot easier than you might think,

Now that you’ve read about how to survive a break-up, check out more info on how to save your relationship. My FREE video presentation shows you how to “rewind” your relationship to a better, more blissful stage. Click here NOW to see the secret behind every happy, successful relationship.