Sometimes things aren’t going well in a marriage, but rather than rush off to couples therapy people like to try a few things at home. One possible thing to try is an exercise designed for couple’s therapy. Couple therapy exercises are created to hopefully bring out the issue in your marriage and allow you to work to resolve it.
This exercise is simple, but the results can be great.
First, sit down with your partner. Look at each other and lock eyes. Just spend a moment with one another this way. Then, instead of complaining about what he or she hasn’t done or has done incorrectly, ask for what you want.
Ask for what you want and make sure it is something tangible.
Do not ask for things such as more love or greater help around the house. What does that mean? It isn’t tangible. Ask for a hug or for help with the dishwasher. Better yet, make specific requests that can be measured. For example, ask for a hug a day or that your partner take over the dishwasher responsibilities every other week. This enables both of you to get one thing that you would like and to know how to meet your partner’s needs.
Try to just ask for one thing and then every week thereafter, check in with each other. You can change your request then if you’d like to ask for something else. Let each other know what you need, why and for how long. This can have a dramatic effect on the balance of your relationship.