Now is not the time for hasty, hyper emotional reactions. If we’re thinking about a breakup, we need to remain calm and in-touch with our emotions.
Don’t be rash when deciding on ending a relationship. I get emails from people who don’t know whether or not to move on from their current relationship, and it’s usually because they get caught up in endless quibbles and pointless fighting. When you and your boyfriend are fighting, it can be easy to forget the reasons why your relationship works in the first place.
A lot of people break up over minor things. It really happens a lot more often than you might think. I got an email from one woman who was fighting with her boyfriend and was desperate to know if they should break up. She was torn, because they had been a couple for over two years, and she was even thinking of marrying the guy. The cause of their fight? He liked to leave his dirty clothes on the floor.
My jaw dropped. They had been together for 3 years, and their relationship was so weak that something so trivial threatened to tear them apart? I was gobsmacked. But, then again, I see this pattern all too often. I advised her to come up with a plan to solve the problem, rather than running away by threatening to breakup. All too often I see couples with no plan as to what to do once fighting breaks out.
Fights are natural with couples. I’ve never met a couple that got along and agreed about everything. Some people are neat and some people are sloppy. Some people like to go to dance clubs and others like a quiet night at home with a scrabble board. To each his own, I always say, because these differences make relationships fulfilling. But differences can also cause conflict.
The main thing I always tell people, whenever someone asks me about getting in a fight, is that in many ways they can be healthy. You can get out frustration by knowing how to deal with conflict. Asserting yourself next time you fight with your boyfriend will give you much needed self respect.
The thing is to not think that “good couples” don’t fight. In fact, the healthiest couples I’ve seen, the ones that go on to get married and grow old and gray together, It’s the couples that hold everything in and don’t actually let out their feelings that end in pain. Don’t be like that. Learn all about my principles of assertiveness that you can glean by reading through this website.
Now that you’ve read about how to deal with a fight, check out more info on how to fix your situation. My FREE video presentation shows you how to “rewind” your relationship. Click here NOW for the secret to a blissful relationship.