Stopping Divorce

Stopping Divorce

There are three guiding principles that can help you stop divorce.

The first principle is: Stop what you’re doing.

Yes, I mean exactly that.  Stop whatever is going on in your life and focus on your marriage.  At this point, there is nothing more important, and you have to start acting like your marriage is worth more than the whole world.  It’s worth more than your job, It’s everything at this point.

It sounds drastic, but divorce is even more drastic.  From a recent survey of recently divorced adults, 56% of them responded that they had regretted getting a divorce.  Most divorces happen in the heat of the moment, when negative emotions start flying high and both partners lose themselves in whatever problems drove them to start arguing.  This is why you have to drop everything.  It allows you to focus on the real problems, not the minutia.

Second Principle: Stop Talking and Listen

This is not just good advice for stopping a divorce, it’s just a generally good idea.  Part of the reason marriages break down is because of poor communication.  If something is the matter, you have to say why. You cannot just sit there and think that your spouse is going to figure everything out for you.

One of the big reasons divorces happen is because people say  things they don’t mean or get into arguments about minutia, but are really angry about something else.  Humans are illogical, emotional creatures.  It’s hard to be reasonable when emotions are running high.

Third Principle: Remember Yourself

I say this a lot, and many of my readers don’t like hearing this, but sometimes a marriage is over with and it’s better if both people exit gracefully.  Remember, the purpose of your relationships is to be happy, and to expand your own happiness.  Your spouse is thinking the same way.  If the relationship is just breaking you down emotionally, or if there’s been infidelity, it may be time to pack up shop.

Apply these three principles and you are already on the way to stopping divorce!

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