Tags Posts tagged with "Relationship Counseling"

Relationship Counseling

Relationship counseling not just for when you’re in a crisis, but for when your relationship needs a tune up.  You have to make sure that you find the right counselor for you!

Relationship counseling can be urgent if anger is involved. Anger can lead people to do dangerous things that they regret later. Get into relationship counseling before you or your partner choose to do something that ruins your relationship forever.  Relationship counseling is also effective BEFORE problems arise, that way you’re emotionally prepared for any rocky periods in your relationship.

The best kinds of relationship counseling focus on anger issues.  Latent anger in a relationship leads to depression and it also leads to emotional breakdowns.  Relationship counseling that deals with anger management is the best bang for your buck.  I cannot tell you how much it helps with getting your relationship back on track.  Remember, you want to head off problems before they start.

What do you mean by anger?  How is it a problem in relationships?

I want to talk about three different types of anger. Then I’m going to teach you how you can learn to deal with anger better and manage it more effectively.One thing about relationship counseling is that you can release the anger pressure valve.  Anger management should be part of relationship counseling.  If it’s not, you need to find someone else.

The first sort of anger is anger with your partner. It’s good to understand that this anger comes from you. While your partner may be doing something that is upsetting you, you are the one who is angry. You are in control of your own anger.

You are in control of yourself

Another important thing to remember is actually an old proverb: You can’t give something away that you don’t have. I realize that when I’m getting angry with other people that it may not have that much to do with them. It may be because of unresolved issues that I have. It’s difficult to get angry at people when you don’t have unresolved feelings inside. It’s usually those unresolved feelings that cause the anger problems to begin with. With relationship counseling you want to get all of that out so that there is nothing left to create anger with.

I’ve also noticed that most of my anger comes when I’m tired. Part of relationship counseling is identifying what your triggers are. What makes you upset and how do you respond? Some things will inevitably upset you more than others. Knowing what those are will help you create a proper coping mechanism.

Find ways to soothe yourself. Regardless of your triggers, you will have to have a plan that helps you feel calm. Think about the patterns you create when you are angry with your partner. Think about the sort of things that cause it and disconnect from that thinking.

The second type of anger is latent anger.

If you are a generally angry person, then this is something that you want to address instantly. This may not require your partner to be present. This may be more of a personal thing.

And the third type of anger is anger aimed at the self.

This is, in my opinion, the worst type of anger. It contributes to the other kinds of anger and it not only creates problems within your relationship but it also creates problems within your life.

If you are angry with yourself, it means that you lack self-compassion. It cripples your self-esteem and makes you feel terrible. You really put yourself down. This isn’t healthy and it will definitely hurt your relationship. In addition to relationship counseling, someone who is constantly angry with themselves may need to seek private therapy.

To create the best possible foundation for your relationship, you need to eliminate anger. And eliminating anger can happen best with relationship counseling.

With your understanding of relationship counseling, learn more with my FREE video presentation. It’ll teach you how to avoid anger and frustration. Understanding the 4 secret stages of a breakup gives you a roadmap to success. Click here NOW to learn the secret…

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Relationship counseling is something that every couple who is struggling should consider. An experienced counselor will help you take an honest look at your relationship troubles.

It’s important that you pick a counselor with a lot of experience. Relationship counseling can be wonderful but only if the counselor knows what he or she is doing. With relationships, they are all so very different that it is a good idea to pick someone who is very knowledgeable about the subject.

Find a therapist who specializes in relationship counseling.  Be sure when you look at their listing that they list relationship counseling or couple’s counseling.  Therapists have specialties.  You don’t want to have a heart doctor look at your leg right?  Be sure that they have experience working with couples.

Select relationship counseling that is results focused – not awareness focused. over the first few sessions, your counselor should be giving you helpful suggestions. they should be working with you to create a plan to save your relationship.  Good relationship counselors will give you actionable advice.

A relationship counselor should also be open, honest, fair, and tough.  The last part is really important because you don’t want someone who takes your money and then tells you everything is alright. When you and your partner are participating in relationship counseling, remember to remain positive. It’s important that both of you think optimistically about your future together.

The second thing that’s really important for you is to not be a passive observer in this process.

If you come in thinking that your relationship is through, then it will be.  Whatever you think of relationship counseling, you cannot be passive.  The therapist is there for guidance, they are there to help you face your emotions.  They are NOT there to do all the hard work for you.  They cannot wave a magic wand and make your relationship better, but then can give you the tools you need to make yours better.

Stay positive and encourage each other. One of you may be feeling negatively towards the process but you both need to work together if you want to save your relationship through relationship counseling.

With your understanding of relationship counseling, learn more with my FREE video presentation. It’ll teach you how to ALWAYS keep the sparks flying. Understanding the 4 secret stages of a breakup allows you get back to a blissful state. Click here NOW to learn the key secret that makes it all possible.

Do you need a relationship rescue? If you’ve found this article, then I’m guessing you do.

I hope you’re prepared to roll up your sleeves, because if you are in need of relationship rescue, then things have gotten pretty bad.  First thing’s first, we need to identify the problem as specifically as we can and singlemindedly work towards a solution.  My advice is succinct and to the point, so it may not be what you want to hear, but it’s what you need to take to heart.

Are you in a rut?  A passionless relationship needs a major rescue plan if you want any hope of salvaging it.  This is especially true if you’ve let things stagnate past the point of no return.  If you find yourself coming home, exhausted, with no interest in having any romance or making love with your partner, you need a relationship defibrillator.

Romance cannot die in relationships.  I don’t care how monotonous your relationship has gotten.  I know sometimes routine can feel mechanical, and in a way, it makes us feel safe, but romance is not about feeling safe.  It’s about challenging yourself to grow in your relationship.  If you’re not doing new things, if you’re not having fantastic romantic weekend getaways, then you’re not living up to your potential.

The first thing to do is sit down with your significant other and start a Dream Journal.   A dream journal is something I started with my wife when we were first together and wanted to write out what we were looking forward to doing together in the future.  You see, you work harder as a couple when you have goals.  One of the things my wife and I put in your dream journal was an Alaskan cruise.  My wife wanted to see the glittering glaciers of the north up close and personal.

I wanted to do something wild and exotic.  I wanted to go skinnydipping near a waterfall.  My wife and I had a good laugh when I first proposed that, but that’s the fun of a dream journal: it’s there for you to figure out what you want out of life and how your partner can help you get there.  This is the basis of relationship rescue.

With your understanding of rescuing your relationship, learn more with my FREE video presentation. It’ll teach you how to wipe the slate clean and let you start over. Understanding the 4 secret stages of a breakup gives you a roadmap to success. Click here NOW to learn the key secret that makes it all possible.

How to Make Up With Your Boyfriend

A relationship breakdown, to me, is one of the most stressful events ever…

Are you experiencing a relationship breakdown?  Some people don’t know that their relationship is on the brink and go about their lives as if nothing is wrong, while others overreact and end up doing more damage than they ever  thought possible. Relationship breakdowns happen a lot especially in stressful situations, and it’s a test to see how well you prepared for such an occassion.

Did you have a battle plan for when a relationship breakdown happens?  You see, it’s better to think about these things beforehand so as to save you a lot of headache later down the road.  It’s common practice in other areas of life to have a plan in case disaster happens.  Think of it as a relationship fire drill.

In your relationship fire drill, try to figure out when you get the most stressed.  You see, relationships get stressed all the time and we can predict under what circumstances we’ll have to endure that stress.  Do you start having relationship breakdowns when the stress at work is just too much to deal with?  What about the kids?  Have you taken any time to relax?  Do you feel your relationship starts to break down when you haven’t had a chance to unwind?

You need to start understanding the emotional dynamics of your relationship.  When do you feel ups and when do you come crashing to the floor?  All too often I see couples who allow the rapid pace of modern life blind them to their natural life rhythms.  They don’t take the time to monitor their relationship and their emotions when external events happen.

You see, relationship breakdowns occur when our relationships start swinging wildly out of control.  It’s like being stuck on a runaway freight train heading straight for a cliff.  We feel like we have to jump off, but are not sure how.  It’s much better to plan out beforehand.  If you know you’re going to have a bad week at work, tell your spouse or significant other that you are taking a vacation right after the week is over.  That way, when you have to meet that 12 o clock deadline and you’ve only had 4 hours of sleep, you don’t feel any need to take it out on your spouse because you have a plan.

With your understanding of dealing with a relationship breakdown, learn more with my FREE video presentation. It’ll teach you how to ALWAYS stay on track. Understanding the 4 secret stages of a breakup gives you a roadmap to success. Click here NOW to learn the secret behind the rewind.

Can sexless relationship therapy really work?  Can it repair a loveless relationship?

Sexless relationships occur when one partner is dissatisfied with the amount of sex happening in the relationship. Usually in these cases, the sex drive of each partner is mismatched, where one partner wants to make love with far greater frequency than the other. There is natural variation in the human sex drive, so it’s highly possible that you can connect with your partner on a number of levels, but in terms of the bedroom, you two can be polar opposites.

In other cases, though, some couples simply lose interest in having sex. Many married couples go for years without having sex, but it’s only recently that this problem is being talked about in the open. Why are there sexless relationships, and does sexless relationship therapy really work? There are ways to deal with a passionless marriage, because a sexless relationship can lead to divorce or separation. Couples who undergo sexless relationship therapy usually lead happier lives. But what type of therapy is best?

When looking through the many books on sexless relationship therapy, or when trying to choose a therapist, always remember that the best sexless relationship therapy is usually intensive and lasts awhile. 

Beware of any book that promises to magically bring romance back into your life, especially with little effort or superficial exercises.

Most of the time, sexless relationships are due to a past trauma in one partner’s life that had remained secret, or other deep, complex issues that cannot be dealt with in a single therapy session or a simple exercise. The longer it is you’ve gone without sex as a couple, the more intense therapy you’ll need. Marriage boot camps are excellent forms of therapy for severe cases, as you’ll spend hours with a trained therapist in a closed, intimate setting, where you will be able to talk at length about issues that may have been bothering you, but you were never conscious of. These camps are usually retreats and most couples who go to them rave about their efficacy.

Specialized Sexless Relationship Therapy

Tantric yoga is a great way to bring a spark back to a relationship and is an effective form of sexless relationship therapy. Tantric yoga focusses on getting the person to be in tune with the energy of their body, especially sexual energy, and teaches people how to heighten their sensory perception. Couples who do tantric yoga together report that their intimacy increases many fold after a few sessions, and find that it’s easier to initiate love making once they reconnect with their spouse. Check your local yellow pages to see if there is a tantric instructor in your city. Even if you have to make a long trip, it’s quite worth it.

Sexless relationship therapy is designed to rebuild intimacy and help you and your partner reconnect and make you remember earlier parts of the relationship when there was still passion and fire. Any therapy worth its salt will not be easy, but the rewards will last a lifetime.

Now that you’ve learned about sexless relationship therapy, I’d like to show you a short video that will help you rekindle all those blissful flames of desire you once had with your lover. It’s possible to rewind your relationship and make it better than ever before. You just need to know one simple secret and my FREE video presentation will show you how. Click here NOW to revitalize the passion in your relationship. You owe it to yourself…and your lover.

Getting sexless marriage therapy could really make a difference in your relationship.

Being in a sexless marriage is emotional poverty.  I have talked to so many people, both men and women, who feel like their marriage went from being a wonderful delight to a sexual prison with their partner as the guard.  A sexless marriage is truly unsustainable and has to be dealt with post haste.  Sexless marriage  therapy is really the way to do it.

You’ll have to put away your reservations about going to a therapist, because sexless marriages are not like the normal bumps in the road with normal relationships.  Some people think that their marriage has failed if they have to seek professional help, but I always remind people that if you truly value your marriage, then you’ll do what it takes to save it.

Many times we are stuck in a sexless relationship because our partner had experienced some trauma early in life, and have carried that baggage into your current relationship.  Rape, incest, abuse, all of these things can be hidden away by your partner because they are too embarrassed to share.  This can be difficult to pull out without a professional to help.

Finding a reputable therapist that can deliver results is not simple.  So many psychologists offer help with sexless marriages, but then come up short.  You need to scrutinize any possible therapist and check their credentials.  Most reputable therapists will have their credentials visible in their office or on their website.  If they are not forthcoming with their educational background, or their philosophy of therapy, then you can just skip them and move on.

After finding a reputable therapist, you need to mentally prepare yourself for what will most likely be a highly emotional journey.  If you’re in a sexless marriage, that means that your relationship has disintegrated and you may not be ready for the roller coast of emotions that awaits.  You’ll be spending a lot of time rebuilding lost trust and exploring your past and your partner’s past.  This can be draining.

Set aside some time from work or other distractions when undergoing sexless marriage therapy.  You do not want your professional life to be negatively affected, and you also just want to give yourself a break.  You are not a machine, no person is, and repairing your relationship will be emotionally draining for you.  Prepare yourself and know yourself; it’s the best advice anyone can ever give.

Now that you’ve explored sexless marriage therapy, check out my FREE video presentation that shows you how to rewind your relationship so you can restore the passion and intimacy you need. Click here NOW to see the secret behind every happy, healthy relationship.

Marriage therapy has been a great success in so many people’s marriage.  It can help heal old wounds and reignite the passion between you and your spouse.

Everything needs maintenance to run properly and with no problems.  You send your car into the mechanic to get an oil change so that it doesn’t break down, causing you to have to make even more expensive repairs.  You update your computer with new software so that you do not get viruses that will wipe out your entire hard drive.  The same principle applies to marriages just as it applies to everything else.  Relationships are works in progress, and marriage therapy is one way we keep our marriage in tip top shape.

Is your sex life boring you?  Do small, insignificant things annoy you about your spouse?  Do you feel mentally trapped?  These are things that have to be nipped in the bud before you find yourself in divorce court.  Marriage therapy takes the philosophy of “prevention” to a level where it works in human relationships.  Marriage therapy will have you critically examining the points in your marriage that you can fix, and the points where you might be weakest at.  Let me tell you a story.

I knew this one couple who seemed absolutely perfect.  They never argued.  They always smiled and loved to do just about everything with each other.  It was almost like watching “Leave it to Beaver.”  Well, underneath the smiling facade was a lot of problems.  I advised the boyfriend to seek a marriage therapist.  I love giving relationship advice, but he really needed to drill into the problem.  Well, the therapist fixed a lot of what was wrong.  You see, they both put on a good face, but behind the scenes, they were not necessarily compatible.

He was a messy slob and she was neat and always liked to be punctual.  He loved rock music while she preferred classical.  He loved to go out while she enjoyed a quiet, peaceful evening at home.  They were attracted and there was a lot that kept their relationship together, but the engine of how they were going to get along day in and day out was not working.  Well, the marriage therapist was able to step in and make sure that nothing became too dire.

She was told to let her hair down a bit while he brushed up on how to be just a bit more conservative.  In fact, playing each other’s roles helped them learn about what made their relationship tick, and they were all the stronger for it.  I saw that couple years later, with children, and they thanked me for pointing them in just the right direction.

Now that you’ve learned about marriage therapy, check out my FREE video presentation that shows you how to rewind your relationship so you won’t need constant therapy. Stop being in a situation that isn’t working. Click here NOW to learn the secret behind every successful relationship.

sexless loveless marriage

As a  self appointed marriage guru, I’ve got some marriage guidance that will help you get through the good times and the bad.

Relationships are an investment.  An emotional investment and a time investment.  We spend time with our partner and nurture our relationships so that we are fulfilled as human beings and gain security and stability in life.  Living alone is not really what we were made to do.  Any marriage guidance worth its salt takes this reality into account.  What do I recommend for a long and happy marriage?

Treasure each day with your spouse.  I know, it sounds corny, and almost like out of a Disney movie, but it’s so true.  We do not take enough time, in my opinion, to value and treasure everything life has given us.  When you take time to treasure your spouse, that means that you renew your commitment to your marriage and all of the good it does in your life.

Treasuring your spouse can mean holding them after a bad day, spending time during the day just talking about the things that weigh on your minds, or going off on a great, spontaneous vacation.  Even leaving a note on the refrigerator, thanking your spouse for being a great person, is a wonderful way to say “You are special to me and I do not want to live without you!”

Always remember that no marriage is perfect, and you will most likely get into a disagreement with your spouse.  That’s normal.  Part of the reason you two are together is to accentuate your individuality and to be better people.  Part of that is maintaining your own sense of self, and that means that there may come times when you and your spouse are at loggerheads about a certain issue.

Know that no matter how bad your argument, there is a core to your marriage, a spiritual link that binds you.  These scuffles may make that link sway to and fro, and  it may be in danger of snapping, However, arguments and fights serve to remind us that our bond is stronger than any adversity.  When you realize that, then you will have all of the marriage guidance you could ever need.

Now that you’ve learned about marriage guidance, watch my FREE video presentation that shows you how to rewind your relationship so you won’t face issues and problems anymore. Get some guidance and stop being in a situation that isn’t working. Click here NOW to learn the secret of super successful marriages.

It’s pretty confusing figuring out how to pick a couples therapist…

A good couples therapist is hard to find.  Believe me, there are plenty of hacks and quacks who will gladly take a few hundred up front and regurgitate what they read from the latest psycho babble book they found on the bookstore shelf. But here’s the real deal: couples therapists who are good and get results don’t seem like the type.  They seem less successful than they really are and are way more low key than you might expect.

How do you separate the good ones from the bad?

Some of the best couples therapists I’ve had the pleasure of meeting had bland, simple websites with bad color schemes.  They didn’t have a book they were hawking or a retreat they were trying to put together that would extract money from their hapless customers.  No, they had a full client lists and were booked for weeks because they got results.  Here are some things you need to look for in a couples therapist.

You see, what you want is someone who will offer intensive therapy one on one.  You also want a therapist who makes it clear from the get go that they are not offering magical elixirs to fix your woes.  You are looking for someone that will really work with you, but also someone that knows that some relationships are better off ending.  You are looking for what is best for you, whatever that leads to.  That’s what you want, and if a therapist offers that, they are worth every dime.

What should I expect when I go to see one?

Couples therapy is a very intense experience.  You are going to be peering into aspects of your psyche that you never thought you’d ever experience.  It’s really difficult to condense all of the many sensations and ideas you will be going through during couples therapy, but rest assured, you will not be the same person afterwards.

Taking action is the key to pretty much everything in life. To regain those initial sensual feelings you had when you first hooked up you need to take action and make the effort to try something new. Watch my FREE video presentation to see how to fix your relationship problems…CLICK HERE to check out the video while you still can…

Getting over Heartbreak

You might be wondering if couples therapy costs are worth the investment…

Couples therapy does not come cheap, especially since you want a quality professional who will be able to work through difficult situations with sensitivity and have the experience of working with many different types of relationships.  If you are seriously considering couples therapy, then you already know how important this moment in your life is, and you do not want to leave your future to an amateur.  Be sure to thoroughly research any psychiatrist or psychologist beforehand and pay special attention to their credentials and previous experience.

Couples therapy can run you anywhere from $75 to $150 an hour on average.  This is really expensive if you consider that most of your sessions will be at least two hours, depending on how much work is needed in your relationship.  You’ll most likely be seeing your therapist weekly, so you may end up spending at least $400 a month on couples therapy.

Do your homework before choosing a professional!

This is why it is so important to do research on your therapist to be sure they are really worth the money.  It’s not hard to find a good therapist, especially if you live in a city, so don’t be afraid to ask probing questions.  For instance, you could ask about the number of couples the psychologist sees on average, and their overall success rate.  It might be hard to talk to couples who have gone to couples therapy to get their opinion, as most people want to remain private, but there is a chance and it can offer insight into what you can expect.

If couples therapy costs really weight on your mind, you might try a retreat or group therapy.  The rates are usually reasonable, since it’s a group, but it may lack the intensity and intimacy of a one on one session.  On the other hand, if you are in need of a vacation, and just want to get away from it all, the cost of a couples retreat is really not so bad. Most couples retreats are located in very scenic spots, like the hills of northern California, or rustic Wyoming.  Some retreats are tropical and feel more like a romantic getaway vacation than a therapy session.  Usually, these retreats costs anywhere from $500-$1,500, maybe even more depending on the locale.

You need to put the health of your marriage before money, so if you feel that you could profit from a couples retreat, you can find one that will fit your budget and leave you with a stronger, longer lasting relationship.

Now that you’ve learned about marriage counseling costs, I’d like to show you a short video that will help you rekindle all those blissful flames of desire you once had with your lover. It’s possible to rewind your relationship and make it better than ever before. You just need to know one simple secret and my FREE video presentation will show you how. Click here NOW to revitalize the passion in your relationship. You owe it to yourself…and your lover.