When It’s Time to Say Goodbye

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A relationship can feel great, but sometimes they become poisonous and toxic.  Sometimes, it’s best to know when it’s time to say goodbye.

If you’ve decided that you would like to end things with your current boyfriend or girlfriend, when it’s time to say goodbye, how should you do it? You don’t want to hurt their feelings, but you’re sure. It’s time to end it.

Moving on is better than living a lie

It’s cruel to keep someone under the illusion that you want to be a committed partner when you do not. Let him or her go if that’s how you feel. Tell them why, you do owe them that, and don’t say anything hateful. Just be honest while letting them down easy.

The most important thing that I remind people about is that it’s okay. Sometimes people begin to worry and stress over breaking up with someone, particularly if they’ve been together a long time. If you aren’t married and there aren’t any kids involved, then it’s just about the two of you. And if you aren’t happy…then you shouldn’t stay in the relationship.

Do not think that you have to stay out of pity.  I know of a friend of mine who stayed with his girlfriend despite the fact that they hadn’t had any sort of relations in over a year. He did it because he felt sorry for her and all her past tribulations.  I said that was a laudable goal, but if she can’t try to make him feel happy as well, then she was simply being selfish.

Be kind to yourself

Don’t beat yourself up for discovering that this person isn’t your soulmate. You’ll find someone else who you do want to spend the rest of your life with and your ex will find someone too. When it’s time to say goodbye, be gentle and kind. In the end, everything will work out for the best if you’ve listened to your needs and considered your relationship at every level.

Being kind to yourself also means that you see relationships as a means of respecting yourself.  No one lives entirely for other people, they live for themselves as well, and by doing so, you can live for other people more deeply.

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